Recovery is a workable and understandable process, a grid to leave behind drugs, alcohol, and dependent relationships. Yes, I may carry on about managed care, the FDA, and the misuse of psych meds, but little drives me up to the bullhorn as quickly as the subject of recovery. Ironically the recovery process remains one of the most primitive, iconoclastic, neofreudian bastions of psychobabble in active practice today.
Recent reports at CorePsych tell you the words I love. I will tell you now about a word that I find completely useless. More than useless, it causes iatrogenic illness [illness caused by the therapist]. This word encourages regression and reductionistic thinking. It is a label without a meaning as the original use of the word was incorrect: Codependency.
So, just what is all this codependency about, and what’s the point? Labels kill initiative. Labels are for the uninformed to babble with each other and remain in the babbledream.
Yes, I said neofreudian. These folks hate Sigmund Freud, and think psychiatrists are lost because they don’t engage in psychobabble, while they use twisted oversimplifications of psychodynamic, Freudian concepts as the basis of their practice process. It is a strange world over there. Especially for myself having completed training in classical Freudian analysis in the 70′s.
My favorite neofreudian tar pit: *the child within*…. more in a later post, or book. Back to this note-
“Codependency” started with the concept that if you were dependent on an alcoholic, you were also dependent, in a way, on alcohol. Wrong out of the gate. Codependency is a label as short sighted as “depression” or “ADD. ““Codependency” is the most universally accepted counterproductive label in the recovering community, and even today creates shortsighted misunderstandings of the recovery process. You are not codependent on alcohol, you are simply dependent on your partner. And your alcoholic partner is dependent on alcohol, and dependent on you. Try to leave and see what happens.
Let’s just scrap that “co” stuff and get back to the basics. Interesting how drug addicts hate it when you tell them they are “codependent,” even joking.
Imagine a Roman Legion trekking off to war with heavy shields and broadswords. -Ready do do line assaults. Codependency is the armor used by many to remain stuck in non-recovery because all the writers stumbled over their own equipment, got lost in the lines of words, and are intrinsically trained to not think for themselves. Old war.
Three books to review these issues:
One has nothing to do with “recovery” per se, but has everything to do with science and the evolution of language and the counterproductive use of words and reductionistic thinking [I confess I had to start this conversation today after referring to this book in my last post on men and stuckness]: Science and Sanity an Introduction to Non-Aristotelian Systems and General Semantics, by Alfred Korzybski
The next has nothing to do with recovery but has much to do with war, thermodynamics, primitive thinking and the possibility of death by lack of imagination: Boyd: The Fighter Pilot who Changed the Art of War by Robert Coram.
and, it’s Monday, shameless self promotion time, my own book Deep Recovery, How to Use Your Most Difficult Relationships to find out Who You Are. Yes, dynamic, psychological forces are at play in the recovery process, let’s not overly simplify them and diminish the possibility of truly correcting them. Recovery does have a biological aspect, a high incidence of depression and ADD in the families, to say nothing of adrenal fatigue, bipolar illness and all the rest. Why not think about all of it, including the meetings and the rooms.
Labels and vertical management systems create dependency relationships.
Amazon looks like they are short supply today on my book [2nd Edition] so if you want it hot off the press [pub in 1992] we can send it out, yes, *signed copy,” for 16$ regular mail, and for only 10$ for the *highly collectible* 1st edition with some really cool typos.
Just send an email [under the picture above] with contact info and we will get back to you – thanks!
Digitally available now at Nook, Kindle, Barnes and Noble.
ADHD Medication Rules – PDF For Your Desktop
ADHD Medication Rules | Paying Attention To The Meds For Paying Attention – Kindle Version
[...] clinical implications. He discusses his views on the words codependency and recovery in this amusing article. The effect of environmental pathogens is discussed here. The relationship between Iodine [...]